On The Air

Hiiiiiiiiiii, this is Claire... In case you haven’t noticed, I decided to write in like purple, because it matches my outfit and makes me look like really thin and every time I like wear purple, people are always telling me how like good I look and I tell them like “duh, I know.” Okay, okay, I’m like so ready to take calls now. Omigod, duh, I know they are really like letters but I always thought that I should have like my own radio show because I have a really great sense of fashion and I totally believe I totally have like the voice for it, you know. Okay, so here we go… I’m totally tripping right now… Hi Anonymous, you’re like on the air… Hellooooo?

Claire could you describe yourself a little bit more in order for us to know you better? How do you know each other?

So, see how Anonymous talks like totally in black, that’s cuz I want to keep my like individuality especially now that I am like a totally famous celebutante. Um I have like a totally non PC question for you… Like what kind of name is Anonymous anyway? I mean like where do you come from? Sounds like someone from like the Midwest like from you know, like Pasadena. Not that there is anything wrong with Pasadena as long as it like stays where it is and doesn't move any closer. Oh and I uh I totally don’t get your question, like how does who know each other? I understand that like you don’t have your own show and you are probably like wicked jealous, but you should maybe take a like a class in how to ask a question, I’m sure.

What? Huh? Oooooohhhh duh. I feel like a total airhead now you know. You mean like how do Robb and I know each other? I’m totally spazzing now. I was out shopping at the Galleria and after I bought this like really cute purple belt I was like totally ready to scarf and so I went to Del Rubios to have some, you know, fish tacos and a diet coke and I was totally grazing and this really cute babe was like watching me. I mean he was like totally cute and I thought Omigod, this guy is like totally checking me out and then he licked his lips and I thought gross, like gag me with a spoon, I’m so sure… So I walked over to him and I like said like don’t think your gonna like French me or anything like that and then he told me that he was like trying to tell me I had like a massive glob of guacamole on my cheek and I was so totally embarrassed but he was like way cool and didn’t even tell me to bag my face or anything like. I mean he like totally saved my life you know. Actually, before I met Robb, my signature color was like brown.

Omigod that was soooo bitchen. Okay who’s like my next caller? Helloooooo?