The shock of the election results is slowly fading away and I find myself moving from a place of disbelief and disappointment to outright anger. I am not angry that Hillary lost, I am angry that Trump won. There are other republicans I wouldn’t have minded so much. I have watched this election bring out the worst in so many people. So many people I love and call family. I have tried to stay out of the negative rhetoric, respecting everyone’s right to a different opinion. The election is over, but the negativity has not stopped. It has increased. Hate crimes have gone up. Trump winning the election means that sexual aggression toward women is OK. Being a racist and/or making racist slurs is OK. Bullying is OK. Hate is OK. Marginalizing entire groups of people is OK. All of that behavior was validated with votes.
I am angry that since the election, I have been living in ever-increasing fear of what this all might mean. What it might mean for me and my family. I’m angry that my family and I face an uncertain future. A future where we don’t even know what rights we will have. If we will even be able to be or stay married. Or keep our jobs. Or enjoy the basic liberties and freedoms that other people in this country do. I’m angry that John and I are on edge. I’m angry that Ryder knows something is in the air and it makes him scared and nervous. I’m angry that John and I have had to talk about what we will do if or when things escalate. Will we need to leave the country to protect our family? Will we need to basically become refugees from a country that was founded by people fleeing religious persecution? I’m angry that all the people who voted for Trump believe that my family, my rights, my life, is less than theirs. I know they are happy and think I should suck it up and get over it. I have seen the posts on Facebook telling me to do just that. But their rights and their families are not on the line.
In less than 72 hours after getting elected, Trump has pulled people into his inner circle that have definite anti-gay motives. And anyone who says they didn’t see that coming needed to look no further than his running mate, Mike Pence. During an October interview with James Dobson, host of the wildly homophobic Focus on the Family, which you can listen to here, Mike Pence assured his interviewer and his supporters that any progress made toward protecting LGBTQ rights under President Obama will be swiftly undone under President Trump. Issue by issue, he asserted over and over again a plan to marginalize and invalidate an entire group of citizens, including me and my family, whom he is about to lead as vice-president.
Trump has pledged to sign the First Amendment Defense Act (FADA), if passed by congress. If he does, it will legalize anti-LGBTQ discrimination across the board, including among employers, businesses, landlords and healthcare providers, as long as they claim to be motivated by firmly held religious beliefs. In March of 2015, Pence signed the Religious Freedoms Restoration Act into law while he was governor of Indiana.
Trump’s domestic policy advisor, Ken Blackwell, spoke to the Columbus Dispatch when he was a candidate for the Ohio governorship, and stated that being gay is a sin, a lifestyle that can be changed and something that can be cured. On his 2000 campaign website, Mike Pence wrote “Congress should support the reauthorisation of the [HIV funding] Ryan White Care Act only after completion of an audit to ensure that federal dollars were no longer being given to organisations that celebrate and encourage the types of behaviours that facilitate the spreading of the HIV virus. Resources should be directed toward those institutions which provide assistance to those seeking to change their sexual behaviour.”
Other members of the Trump transition team cited as red flags by the Human Rights Campaign are former Attorney General Ed Meese, a fellow at the Heritage Foundation who has said same-sex marriage “shows how the culture has deteriorated over two centuries,” and former U.S. Office of Personnel Management chief Kay Cole James, who in her book “Transforming America from the Inside Out,” compared gay people to drug addicts, alcoholics, adulterers, or “anything else sinful.”
On their blog, the National Organization for Marriage commits to working with Trump’s administration to:
- Nominate conservative justices to the U.S. Supreme Court and inevitably reverse the ruling of the Supreme Court imposing same-sex ‘marriage’ on the nation. The quotes around marriage are theirs, not mine.
- Rescind over-reaching executive orders and directives, including the dangerous “gender identity” directives.
- Pass the First Amendment Defense Act. As I mentioned previously, Trump has already pledged to sign
Anyone who thinks my rights or the rights of my husband, child and family are not going to come under scrutiny and quite possibly get reversed has their head in the sand. His choices are clearly showing that is one of his administration’s big priorities.
I know I have friends and family that are happy for a Trump victory, and that is something I am having a very hard time dealing with and accepting. I am not less of a citizen. I am not less of a human. My family is not less than anyone else’s. My son is not less deserving of a safe and secure family than his friends. My relationship is not less than yours. My life is not less than Trump, the people in his administration and the people that voted for him believe.
People have the right to vote for whoever they chose. It is one of the things that make our country great. But one person’s vote should not cost the rights of another.
This is going to take some time.
This is going to take a very long time.