Christmas Shopping

I was walking down the street last night on my way to meet Marco for raspberry mojitos when I happened to catch a stock of purple glitter Christmas trees in one of the stores. The first question that came to mind is how does one decorate a purple glitter tree? I realized that none of the lessons I have learned in my life prepared me for such a challenge. It all felt a bit like the makings of a new reality show, “A Trailer Park Christmas”.

I am still trying to get into the Halloween groove and was just about to send out the invitations for my Peanuts influenced “Great Pumpkin Cocktail Party” where we would all gather in the local pumpkin patch, fully equipped with ice and blenders and just puree ourselves into an alcoholic frenzy where I’m quite convinced that my signature invention, pumpkin mojitos, are going to be the show stealer. Suddenly I find myself wondering if I should just skip Halloween and hold the festive festivities at bay until December. Not knowing what to do, I did what I do best. I went shopping.

Every year, Neiman Marcus publishes their Christmas catalogue and this year I decided to let my fingers do the walking and came across the must haves for this holiday season. So, without further ado, here are my top choices for gifts this year, those special presents that look so great under the tree and really say “I love you” - I feel just like Oprah when she gives away all those gifts... Only I will be more discreet and not opt to do it live on television. I find all that self-promotion just pathetic.

For those with an avdenturous spirit, Virgin Atlantic's charter to space is definately in order and at the bargain basement price of $1,764,000.00 you can't really afford not to buy it. Of course, if art is their thing then why not a Pencil Skyscraper by The Art Guys? Prices run from $6,000.00 to $40,000.00, but for your very own skyscraper, I think it's a hell of a bargain. Not one to leave out the happy couples among us, my next recommendation is His and His (or His and Hers if you insist) Human Electric Hybrid Vehicle for a mere $40,000.00. Golf? Wine? Networking? Then a membership at The Club at Castiglion Del Bosco is the gift that keeps on giving, and for $3,800,000.00, it better and for that fashionista in your life, the House of Fath Couture Archives can be theirs for $3,500,000.00. Laura, pay very close attention to this one... Limited Edition Pet Homes from $5,000.00 to $7,000.00. I really think Chewby needs a couple. You can’t expect him to keep sleeping in that Gucci dog bed forever, you know! There is only so much abuse one little animal can take. In this crazy world where we seem to be surrounded by one horrible news story after another, why not a backyard waterpark for the kid in all of us? Why should Mohammed go to the pool when for prices starting at $100,000.00, the pool can come to Mohammed? And last, but not least, the Nieman Marcus Limited-Edition 2007 BMW Individual M6 Convertible. We all know it is not about where you go, but how you look getting there, and $139,000 is a small price to pay for a fabulous image.

Well, I do believe my work here is done. Happy shopping!